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Are you a "cool mom"? Do you want to be one? What do you think defines that?”

6 replies so far...

  • What a cool question, Florinda! I'm with you on your definition of ''coolness'. Not forgetting who the parent is key. The kids are always welcome here, and they are here often!--but we have rules and expectations of their behavior. They think I'm cool because I 'get' it and am a techie, and I"m the only mom with a tatoo. I think it's also because I respect them, and find their perspectives and personalities amazing! I'll check out their video games and music, and pay attention while I"m doing it-some things I like, some I don't and we talk about why I don't like things that they like. Some kids are witty, some are sweet, some drive me nuts... I also think because I always make sure everyone has rides, has eaten, has a hoodie, everyone has money for the movie, and then push them out the door. It's a hard balance

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by OliveMartini on 28th September 2007

  • My son isn't old enough to know what a cool mom is, and I'm not sure if I care or not if I am a cool mom. By cool, I am thinking that it would be someone who is up on the trends and can relate with them at whatever given age they think they are cool at.
    I'm young at heart and I definitely don't look my age, but I don't think I want to be thought of as "one of the kids" by him or his friends.
    I would love to be the kool-aid mom that all the kids love, but love because they know they can talk to me and that I will be honest with them.. however that I will not tolerate breaking rules and disrespect. Then yeah.. I hope I'm the cool mom.

    If not. Well, my husband will tell me I'm cool so I'll survive.

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by The Tattooed Mommie on 28th September 2007

  • Florinda, I'm glad that you specified that being cool doesn't mean "satisfying every whim and want". I think that a lot of parents try and be cool and lose their kids respect in the process. I have a she thinks I'm pretty cool right now regardless. I would like to be thought of as a cool mom, but definitely not a push over. I plan to just be myself, and keep up with my daughter's interests.

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by mamajama on 28th September 2007

  • My husband says I am a cool mom, but I'm not sure what he means by it. Probably that I am fun (generally, although when my daughter is testing me, it's less fun for all!), wear funky tshirts (his words), make up fun activities to do with my daughter, etc. Me - I don't know if that's so cool!

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Nataly on 27th September 2007

  • I'm a cool mom. I know what's up and I know how old I am and what my role is in the relationship. Her friends like me and think I am nice. I take my daughter on 'adventure days' where we walk through the ancient streets of Istanbul and end up at a whole building of bead shops that only I know about and let her load up on supplies. I taught her all of the English swear words, but respect that she thinks they are uncouth. I like to watch teen movies, with popcorn and cokes. I am an information-aholic and a Web hound, so I am able to give her way too much information on almost anything she needs to know (BA, MA in history). I introduce her to new web technologies and encourage her as a pixel artist. Probably most significant for her, I support her in her dressage riding by finding the right horse, paying his bills, and driving her to her training sessions four times a week, an hour each way (we listen to podcasts in the car), and when she is sick, I take over training her horse. I have an uncanny knack for finding clothes that she adores, so she prefers to go shopping with me. I think what is most important of all is that I *like* her and I am happy to spend time with her. I am also okay if she goes off with her friends (just so you don't think I am smothering her.) I am "cool" because I am willing to share myself and my interests with her, and to go in any direction she is interested in pursuing. :)

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by KatieK on 27th September 2007

  • (I know I asked this question, but I'm including my own response since this is a topic I'm thinking of writing about.) "Mom" is the only part of my life in which I've ever been remotely "cool." For me, that's meant knowing how to speak my son's language while not forgetting that I'm the parent. It's meant mutual respect and finding common ground. It's meant being welcoming to his friends while being clear about the boundaries. It's meant being approachable and open. It has NOT meant dressing or acting like I'm his age. It has NOT meant satisfying every whim or want.

    Flag as inappropriate Posted by Florinda Pendley Vasquez on 26th September 2007